Slow Down: How To Make Time and Space For Focused Thinking^Featured

January 1, 2023

861

This post explains why a busy, fast environment can hinder thinking in our children and explore how parents can provide time and space to think.

Slowing down is a low cost and high impact way to help your child practice focused thinking.

Is your child too busy to think? An environment of hurry hinders thinking.
Time and space for thinking can produce deeper engagement with a task.
Try This [infographic]
Takeaways

Too Busy to Think

Modern American culture glorifies “busy.” Our own lack of margin, as adults, can manifest in time pressures for our children. Rushing from activity to activity removes the open time necessary to focus, think, create, or innovate. Overscheduling can be exhausting not just physically but also mentally–children who are overscheduled are hindered in their ability to solve problems and make good decisions¹.

An environment of hurry hinders thinking.

Between our adult agendas and our children’s schedules, down time could be called the new American Dream. Down time is needed more than ever, and more elusive now than ever.

Down time is critical because it provides opportunities for 1) play, 2) relaxation, and 3) connection¹. These are essential ingredients for healthy brains:

Play is a child’s “work”. Play allows experimentation, testing, and practice.
Relaxation is an antidote to stress, which is important because stress blocks our access to the front of our brains (the prefrontal cortex) where more advanced thinking occurs.
Connection is essential in grounding our children and knowing that they have a safe person with whom they can make mistakes and grow. Connection fosters resilience (capacity to endure hardship) and a growth mindset (ability to learn and grow with practice) in our children.

Our fast pace can hinder our children when they lack opportunities for focused play, lack a physical environment to promote thinking due to stimulation and distraction, or when the fast pace leads us as parents to rush them through play and disrupt their focus.

Over time, our brains can become hardwired for fast and shallow thoughts rather than deep thinking or focused attention.

Our children—and us– need time and space to think.

Time and space for thinking can produce deeper engagement with a task.

Have you ever been so focused on a project, absorbed in a book, or captivated by a challenging problem that you became unaware of your surroundings? After being in this focused state, did you feel a sense of satisfaction in your work, or relief from common worries that occupy your mind?

In everyday life you might hear someone say they were “in the zone” at work. In modern psychological research, this is called hyperfocus, sustained attention, or even a “flow state.” (*See the end of this article for two important clarifications about the labels hyperfocus and flow).

Researchers describe flow as “full task engagement²” that involves absorption with a task and less thinking about oneself. There are a few key criteria: 1) the task is fun or interesting, 2) there is sustained attention, 3) the environment is diminished (time flies and you aren’t paying attention to your surroundings), and 4) task performance improves (you are able to do your work well).

While there is not consensus regarding which parts of the brain are specifically linked to hyperfocus (possibly a combination of attention networks)³, there are known benefits² to flow:

stimulus of the reward system in the brain (positive emotions and satisfaction)
improved task performance
enhanced concentration

It is beneficial for our children to become engrossed in a task. And the most typical flow experience is play⁴! Children typically choose play tasks that are fun or interesting to them (the first criteria of flow), but whether or not they deeply immersive themselves in play depends on the child, the environment, and their capacity for sustained attention (typically increasing with maturity). As adults, we can’t always predict when our child will get “in the zone” for deep play, but we can create an environment that supports their concentration efforts.

Focused play is incredibly useful to our children both now and for their future endeavors. Think about the concentration needed to practice playing a new piece of music, or sit and think through a challenging LEGO® set, or construct a castle from wood scraps in the backyard. Later in life, they will need to focus and take exams, write papers, create presentations, and solve real-world problems in business, politics, the classroom, the operating room, the church, or wherever they choose to work and create.

Does your pace of life allow time for you and your children to deeply focus on something interesting? Can you lose yourself in a great book? Can your son lose track of time while he paints? Can your daughter tune out the rest of the world when she is coloring?

Try This

Making time for thinking provides opportunity for focused thinking. A physical space that promotes focused attention sets up our child’s brain for success. The parent’s role is to warmly support focused attention by watching and knowing when to encourage and when to hold back and resist interrupting.

Make time for focused thinking

When? Choose a gap between activities on your paper planner or Google calendar and leave that white space. Choose a time when your child is well rested and already fed. During that time, provide your child with a single open ended toy or specific task that can lead to immersive play. For example, provide only a train and set of tracks, or only a basket of building blocks.
- Consider exchanging an extracurricular for open play, particularly in young children. “Even structured after school activities may take a toll on a child’s ability to stay engaged with one thing for as long as it takes to lose herself in it.⁵”
How much time? As long as it takes for a child to lose themselves in one single activity. It is okay if the window of time is small at first. Aim for a few minutes at first and then encourage longer periods of play as the child’s capacity for sustained attention improves. Choose a realistic expectation (only a few minutes for very young children) and remember that their capabilities improve over time, not in one play session.

Make space for focused thinking

Our child’s environment (the physical place and the people around them) can promote or disrupt attention.

The physical place
- A screen free environment is the best for building attention skills. Fast paced moving images and intuitive programming remove the workload from your child’s brain, and we want your child to think for himself rather than distracting from cognitive work with a moving image.
- Decrease obvious sources of stimulation such as loud noises, music (unless it is classic or instrumental), or very bright lights.
- Choose outside⁶ as often as possible. All children benefit from calming effects nature play, and even children with known attention deficits have shown fewer symptoms after time outdoors⁶.

The parent
- School aged children may benefit from solitude, while younger children will likely benefit from having a parent nearby. Space for thinking does not always have to include solitude, which is sometimes unrealistic and does not reflect typical learning and play that occurs in pairs and groups in young children.
- A parent’s involvement can positively or negatively impact a child’s attention.
  - Observe before you interrupt. When your child is working independently on a task and looks very focused, it may actually be distracting to verbally praise and interrupt.
  - Controlling how the child plays or intruding in play is counterproductive to building attention or independent thinking skills⁷.
    - In a study on focused attention in toddlers, researchers explored connections between mothers’ parenting and toddlers’ attention and found that a mother’s control of play was negatively related to attention scores:
      - “Although more active guidance may facilitate attention and play in infants and younger toddlers, parental behaviors that continue to reflect high levels of behavioral control or explicit direction and intervention can be inappropriate for more skilled toddlers, providing little support for children’s own natural tendencies to engage with objects and tasks in the environment and instead being disruptive or frustrating. For children who are already poorly attentive, parental interference may be particularly detrimental…⁷“
    - The study also reported negative impacts of mothers intruding in play, such as “overwhelming the child with a barrage of stimulation, changing the focus of play without regard to the child’s interest, or physically manipulating the child or the child’s actions.⁷“
  - In the same longitudinal study⁷, greater use of mothers’ praise during teaching tasks (not independent tasks) predicted higher attention and both mothers’ warmth (i.e. affectionate or supportive) and mothers‘ positive affect (positive mood or expressions) were positively related to attention.
    - Essentially, mothers who were warm, positive, and encouraging at the right times were most beneficial for their child’s attention.

Takeaways

By providing time and space for our children to practice focused thinking (low cost), we encourage important cognitive skills (high impact)

Slowing the pace of life can create thriving little thinkers. Leave margin in life! Leave room for learning, exploration, creativity, or design. Give your child room to wonder. Leave space and time for curiosity.

If we fill the child’s schedule to the brim, where is the room for his thoughts?

Providing margin in your child’s schedule may actually save you money if you choose to eliminate costs toward entertainment or schedule-fillers. Structured extracurriculars can be wonderful, but not if they dominate the schedule and eat all of your child’s margin for focused play. Talk with your spouse and your child about what activities to keep and which to try another time. Decreasing distractions in your environment does not incur costs. Taking your child outside also costs nothing, and greatly benefits attention skills. As the parent, you can support thinking as a supportive and warm observer (and encourager) of your child’s play. Your presence takes connection, not coin.

Downtime impacts our children’s brains and our family cultures. It provides opportunities for play, relaxation, and connection. Slowing down creates opportunities for learning. Hurry hinders thinking. A physical space that promotes focused attention sets up our child’s brain for success. A supportive, observant parent can positively impact a child’s attention. Children need to practice focused attention through play to build important skills for their futures.

Want to Learn More?

If you struggle with interrupting your child’s concentration during work or play, read How to Encourage Independent Thinking for a simple hack.

Does your child enjoy building? Practice focused attention using LEGO® bricks and build thinking skills in the process. Read 5 Ways LEGO® Bricks Promote Learning to find out more.

Two Clarifications on Flow and Hyperfocus

Hyperfocus is often mentioned in the context of autism, schizophrenia, or ADD/ADHD in which attention is impacted by neurological changes, but hyperfocus occurs in neurotypical individuals as well (people with typical neurological development) and is incredibly useful².
To be clear, this flow state is specific to being absorbed in a task, so it is NOT the same use of “flow” used in eastern religion. It isn’t referring to zen, taoism or other attempts to empty the mind. It is task specific.

References

Cleveland Clinic (2018). Is Your Child Overscheduled? Kids Need “Down Time” https://health.clevelandclinic.org/is-your-child-overscheduled-kids-need-down-time/
Ashinoff & Abu-Akel (2021). Hyperfocus: The Forgotten Frontier of Attention https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7851038/pdf/426_2019_Article_1245.pdf
Linden, Tops, & Bakker (2020). Go with the Flow: A Neuroscientific View on Being Fully Engaged https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7983950/pdf/EJN-53-947.pdf
Csikszentmihaly (2014). Flow and the Foundations of Positive Psychology: The Collected Works of Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi (ebook) https://link.springer.com/book/10.1007/978-94-017-9088-8
Perry (2009). Creative Kids Learn to Flow (Part 1) https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/creating-in-flow/200911/creative-kids-learn-flow-part-1?amp=#amp_tf=From%20%251%24s&aoh=16667956941485&csi=1&referrer=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.google.com
Lund (2018). Top 5 Benefits of Chldren Playing Outside. Sanford Health https://news.sanfordhealth.org/childrens/play-outside/
Gaertner, Spinrad, & Eisenberg (2008). Focused Attention in Toddlers: Measurement, Stability, and Relations to Negative Emotion and Parenting https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2607062/pdf/nihms-81608.pdf

Featured

in Biblical, Critical

What Can Beauty Teach Us? 3 Lessons Learned in Italy^Featured

by Rachael Mumbower

December 4, 2022

1. Beauty teaches us about God

All beauty points us upward to the creator of all beauty, who is ultimately the most beautiful, in all of his glory. Russ Ramsey recently published a book called Rembrandt is in the Wind: Learning to Love Art Through the Eyes of Faith. Ramsey states that we have a “theological responsibility” to intentionally and continually interact with beauty for three reasons: 1) God is intrinsically beautiful, 2) creation is intrinsically beautiful, and 3) “God’s people shall be adorned in beauty for all eternity.”

When we are looking at a piece of artwork that moves us or stirs us because it is so beautiful, our hearts are displaying an inherent longing that only God can satisfy. “No other creature stops to behold something beautiful for no other reason than that it has stirred something in their souls. When we do these things, are we not like Moses and David, hungering to see the glory of God?”(Ramsey, 2022).

When we introduce our children to beauty, we are filling up the treasure chest of their minds with beautiful things. Think of the verse “…whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy–think about such things.” Phillipians 4:8 (NIV). Filling up your child’s mind with “whatever is lovely” doesn’t necessarily mean taking a trip to Italy. It can be reading the beautiful and powerful words of Scripture over lunch, or listening to Bach’s Cello Suite #1 in G Major while playing with blocks in the playroom. It could look like a basic arts craft after library storytime or a walk around the neighborhood admiring Christmas lights and holiday decorations together. Loveliness and beauty are all around us, and we can point it out to help our children find it wherever they go. Sharing beauty with others, including our children, is part of what makes beauty so enjoyable. “We ache to share the experience of beauty with other people, to look at someone near us and say, Do you hear that? Do you see that? How beautiful!” (Ramsey, 2022).

2. Beauty inspires creativity

We were created to create. God created and we were made in his image. While we often create for what is useful, we also create “beauty for beauty’s sake” because that is what God did in much of creation (Ramsey, 2022). The world is full of things that were created beautiful, not because they had to be, but because they could be.

When we see others creating, or we see the product they have created (music, painting, sculpture, architecture, etc.) we are inspired to create, too (Ramsey, 2022). Marveling at sculpted marble does not mean I will become a sculptor, but maybe I am inspired to beautify my own home and spaces around myself and my family. After admiring the use of vibrant colors, I’m emboldened in the choices of my wardrobe or choosing to plant a bright flower in our garden. By seeing a familiar bible story in a painting, a child might be encouraged to draw it or act it out. When I hear an enchanting melody, I am able to relax and be present to see (and hear) the beautiful things around me. When I’m served a warm, frothy cappuccino, and the smell of coffee and chocolate fills a little Roman cafe, I’m inspired to make hot chocolate for my children and snuggle up with a good book when I get back home.

Seeing beauty spurs creativity. Seeing the creativity of others inspires more creativity–more perspectives–more ideas.

3. Studying beauty promotes biblical and critical thinking skills

The goal of thriving little thinkers is to create kids who know how to think. Studying sources of beauty builds important thinking skills, both biblical thinking and critical thinking. If beauty points us to God, then studying beauty can be linked to biblical thinking (read above about how beauty teaches us about God). We can promote biblical thinking and reflect on the beauty of God by pointing out the beauty around us everyday and discussing how all earthly beauty is pointing toward the ultimate heavenly beauty.

Studying beauty can also build critical thinking. Art study is even used in preschools and elementary schools to build thinking skills: “By looking closely together at a Picasso or a Cezanne, 4- and 5-year-olds are learning how to observe and translate their thoughts into language and listen and respond to multiple perspectives” (Frey, 2015).

A nonprofit called Visual Thinking Strategies has created a research based approach to helping early learners develop a mental framework for evaluating art. Instead of the teacher reciting “pre-digested information which is not relevant,” or asking the student a dozen pointed questions, the teacher asks only two open-ended questions to stimulate thinking. These questions are:

What is going on here?

What do you see that makes you say that?

By asking these questions, the teacher encourages young and novice students to look closely, observe carefully, and to provide evidence for their responses. The process of answering these questions builds practical thinking skills that “spill over in useful ways into other subjects” (Housen, 1999)

Try This Today

1 ) Pick one masterpiece from this list (or use a personal favorite) or choose an excellently illustrated children’s book. “Picture books are an entry point to art and illustration. They can also widen a child’s aesthetic horizons” (Gurdon, 2019)

The Last Supper by Leonardo da Vinci
The Creation of Adam by Michaelangelo (from the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel)
Girl with a Pearl Earring by Vermeer
Impression, Sunrise by Claude Monet
Starry Night by Vincent van Gogh

2 ) Look at the chosen art or illustration together. Don’t point out anything specific. Just observe.

3 ) Ask the two simple questions suggested by Visual Thinking Strategies:

What is going on here?
What do you see that makes you say that?

You can paraphrase and reflect back their answers but try not to correct. There are no wrong answers here–this is a chance to practice developing an opinion and explaining it to others. If other family members are present, have them answer the questions too. This provides opportunities to practice listening and respecting the opinions of others. It may also open up new insights when your child (or you) hear alternative perspectives about the piece you are observing together.

Resources

Introducing art study

In our home, we do a group learning time together called “Morning Time” while we eat breakfast and for a few minutes after–just before we begin our day. We are using a printed curriculum from Brighter Day Press, and it includes art and picture study each week with a chosen artist. We are using Morning Time Volume 1, and highly recommend it! In addition to art study, it has open and go recommendations for bible readings, prayer, scripture memory, hymn study, music appreciation, poetry, and recommendations for read alouds. Click here to read more about the concept of Morning Time.

More art fun

The 123s of Art (for young leaners)

Mornings with Monet

Paint by Sticker Masterpieces (An art related activity book)

Louise Loves Art (This is one of my children’s favorites. It isn’t about art study, but about Louise’s love of art and her brother Art and recognizing that her masterpiece might be different than his.)

Rembrandt is in the Wind: Learning to Love Art Through the Eyes of Faith (A book for parents who are interested in learning more about art and faith.)

Book lists

https://growingbookbybook.com/art-books-for-kids/

https://www.livingbookslibrary.com/top-living-art-books/

CLICK HERE to receive a free monthly newsletter with exclusive brain based tips.

References

Russ Ramsey (2022). Rembrandt is In the Wind: Learning to Love Art Through The Eyes of Faith https://www.amazon.com/Rembrandt-Wind-Learning-through-Faith/dp/0310129729
Susan Frey (2015). Art appreciation helps young children learn to think and express ideas. https://edsource.org/2015/art-appreciation-helps-young-children-learn-to-think-and-express-ideas/77734
Housen, Abigal (1999). Eye of the Beholder: Research, Theory, and Practice https://vtshome.org/wp-content/uploads/2016/08/Eye-of-the-Beholder.pdf
Gurdon, Meghan (2019). The Enchanted Hour. https://www.amazon.com/Enchanted-Hour-Miraculous-Reading-Distraction/dp/0062562819

Featured

in Academic, Brain Basics, Critical, Resources

5 Excellent Books for Raising Thinkers^Featured

by Rachael Mumbower

November 9, 2022

Reading and learning for yourself, as a parent, increases your own thinking skills and is a low cost and high impact way for you to improve your child’s thinking skills. It’s a win-win.

Here is the list of 5 books I highly recommend for raising thriving little thinkers:

1. The Whole Brain Child by Daniel J. Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson

A great book about brain basics with specific strategies for promoting cognitive integration (using your whole brain). This book is written by the same authors as The Yes Brain. It is research based, well written, easy to understand, and clearly organized.
One favorite quote: “As parents become more aware and emotionally healthy, their children reap the rewards and move toward health as well. That means that integrating and cultivating your own brain is one of the most loving and generous gifts you can give your children.”

2. The Yes Brain by Daniel J. Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson

Another great book about brain basics. This book is helpful for providing specific strategies in building resilience and curiosity in kids. I don’t want my children to fear failure, or avoid mistakes. This book explains how to cultivate the right environment as the parent to promote the mindset we want our children to master. This book is written by the same authors as The Whole Brain Child and similarly research based, well written, easy to understand, and clearly organized.
One favorite quote: “What you do and don’t value, and what you do and don’t give attention to, will impact who your child becomes.”

3. The Read Aloud Family by Sarah Mackenzie

A great book about academic thinking and family culture, this one is helpful no matter what age your children are. Sarah Mackenzie crafts compelling arguments for cultivating a read-aloud environment in your home. She explains the academic benefits and the deepened relationships resulting from reading books together as a family.
One favorite quote: “When we read aloud, we give our kids practice living as heroes. Practice dealing with life-and-death situations, practice living with virtue, practice failing at virtue. As the characters in our favorite books struggle through hardship, we struggle with them. We consider whether we would be as brave, as bold, as fully human as our favorite heroes. And then we grasp—on a deeper, more meaningful level—the story we are living ourselves as well as the kind of character we will become as that story unfolds.”

4. Teaching from Rest: A Homeschooler’s Guide to Unshakable Peace by Sarah Mackenzie

Don’t let the word “homeschooler” lead you away from this book–replace the word “teaching” with “mothering” and you can quickly summarize the contents and apply it to your home. Sarah Mackenzie, the same author as The Read Aloud Family, writes beautiful words of encouragement for a mother who feels too much rests on your shoulders. While it is written from a homeschooling perspective, the concept of parenting and teaching from rest is applicable to any parent wanting to raise thriving little thinkers.
A favorite quote: “It’s easy to forget that teaching is holy work. We forget that building up the intellect- teaching our children to really think- does not happen by the might of human reason, but rather by the grace of God. On an ordinary day, you and I likely have a set of tasks we’ve scheduled for our kids. But it’s more than math. It’s more than history. It’s the building up of our children’s minds and hearts, and we can only do that if we realize that this is how we thank Him for the graces He so lavishly pours out on us.”

5. Awakening Wonder: Opening Your Child’s Heart to the Beauty of Learning by Sally Clarkson

I found this book to be more inspirational and beautifully written than practical. But the vivid picture of a child who loves learning has stuck with me and encourages me as I teach and train my children. Sally Clarkson describes her experiences teaching her own four children and how she created a culture of “wonder” and tried to create a “wonder-filled life.” It’s an excellent source of inspiration for those seeking to instill a love of learning in their families.
One favorite quote: “Education is not about enacting a prescriptive, boxed sort of curriculum-based classroom, but instead is about passing on a legacy of a love for learning, an independent joy in discovery, a motivation to bring light, beauty, and goodness back into the world of our children.”

A Note on Cost: While I’ve personally read all of the books listed, I borrowed them before I purchased them. My local library has excellent apps like Libby or Hoopla that allow me to listen to the audiobook for free or I can request hardcopies from within our local library system. I encourage you to utilize resources near you and get creative! If you prefer to purchase your own hardcopies to take notes or keep as reference, great! Just know that it isn’t required.

Featured

in Brain Basics, Critical

How to Encourage Independent Thinking^Featured

by Rachael Mumbower

September 1, 2022

2 Comments

411

This post describes a physical and mental exercise for parents and children, called “looking hands” to enhance independent thinking and problem solving.

Put your hands behind your back.
Why is it useful to keep our hands to ourselves?
Try This Today: 3 ways to try “looking hands” in your home today
Takeaway

Put your hands behind your back.

When my daughter was a toddler, she was eager to explore her surroundings. Everything was new and exciting and she wanted to touch, feel, smell, and taste it all. While this is developmentally appropriate and I wanted to encourage exploration—there are some things that just are not safe for a toddler to explore (i.e. breakable objects like glass, sharp knives, etc.) For those items I would say “Use your looking hands” and she would put her hands behind her back and focus on exploring with her other senses. We would talk about whatever the object was, describe it, and explore it without physically touching it.

I honestly trained my children to use looking hands because I needed them to keep their hands to themselves. It was for their safety, yes, but also for my productivity and efficiency. If I could do something myself without interference, it would be done more quickly and correctly with less mess.

I began to learn that while there may be less mess when I take over, there is less learning happening, too.

While teaching nursing clinical students in a neuro ICU, I was observing a student prepare a medication and saw her fumbling. I reached over to help but she politely and firmly said “I’ve got it, Dr. Mumbower.” She was right! She NEEDED to fumble and try again so that she could learn and have the muscle memory to perform the skill next time. She needed me to observe and coach, not take over and micromanage.

I did not expect looking hands to be something that would help me as the adult. I realized that I needed to put my hands behind my back, too. I need to use “looking hands.”

I began putting my hands behind my back into looking hands position whenever I was observing a student so that I could give myself time to observe and think before interrupting their concentration or necessary fumbling. When students were new or needed more hands on help, I would simply say “I’m here when you need me.” And when students were competent and clearly ready to perform, I would say “I’m just here as backup. You’ve got this.”

My student’s polite and respectful comment led me to consider what I appreciated most about the many “coaches” or instructors I had over the years. The ones I felt the most discouraged by were the ones who micromanaged or rushed me or “took over for me” because I was trying to figure things out or pause and check over my work. The ones I appreciated the most were the ones who assessed my ability and then stepped back and let me practice. They gave feedback and let me try again.

Looking hands is now part of my parenting, not just part of my clinical teaching. I use looking hands when I am tempted to rush my toddler through putting his shoes on, or when I am tempted to interrupt my daughter’s question of curiosity about a new book and tell her the answer for the sake of expedience. Looking hands is a physical reminder to put myself in the position of a coach, and to act accordingly.

Why is it useful to keep our hands to ourselves?

When we use our “looking hands” with our children, and learn the art of when to step away and say “You’ve got this,” we build their self efficacy. Self efficacy is a person’s belief in their competence to execute a specific behavior or achieve a particular goal. Self-efficacy is not self-esteem (a general regard a person has for themselves) nor a general attribute of confidence. It is gained by doing a skill over and over, again and again.

Using your “looking hands”–putting your hands behind your back–when your child is trying an activity can be a low cost and high impact way of helping them learn to think and practice on their own. Yes, they will make a mess. Yes, it will take longer than if you do it for them. But the goal isn’t perfection. The goal is independent practice.

Here are 3 ways to try “looking hands” in your home today:

While teaching or training
- After modeling how to perform a task, give your child a turn and use your “looking hands” while they work. Do not interfere unless they ask for help and try verbally coaching instead of physically interfering with their practice. Show your child how to make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and then step back and let them try on their own.
While playing
- When working with a puzzle or toy, avoid the impulse to show them the solution and use your “looking hands.” Allow them to try different pieces and problem solve. If they ask for help, try verbal coaching toward the next step rather than completing the task for them.
While talking
- With an older child or teenager who faces a conceptual problem (like a breakup or friend drama) and not a physical problem, use the idea of parent “looking hands” and try not to jump in and “fix” the problem. Empathize and then talk with them through potential next steps toward a solution. You can physically place your hands behind your back in the “looking hands” position to help you remember that you are coaching, not doing things for them.

TAKEAWAY

Taking over for our children doesn’t allow them the freedom to think, fail, and try again. While letting our children think through tasks or problems is more time consuming and potentially more messy, it’s critical to allow them to fumble and try. Put your hands behind your back. Conquer the urge to interfere or micromanage. Coach them–don’t complete it for them. Learn the art of when to step away and say “You’ve got this.” The goal isn’t perfection. The goal is independent practice.

in Academic, Biblical, Critical

Why Thinking Needs to Be Taught and Why Parents are the Best Teachers

by Rachael Mumbower

August 24, 2022

1 Comment

543

This post explains why thinking needs to be taught and why parents are in the ideal position to teach their children this crucial skill.

Why you should intentionally teach your child to think
Why you are the ideal person to teach your child
Takeaway

Thinking

Thinking is actively using your mind to connect ideas, understand, make judgements or decisions, and solve problems. One of the best ways we can set our children up for success in their future marriages, careers, families, or any endeavor is to teach them to think.

The ability to think can be viewed as a skill that can be practiced and improved. With a growth mindset, learning to think is something that our children can practice and improve just as if they were practicing to boost their soccer abilities or video game score. Learning to think can be developed over time through instruction and practice. In The Whole Brain Child¹ a book about brain-based parenting, Dr’s Dan Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson describe a growth mindset in this way:

“With intention and effort, we can acquire new mental skills. What’s more, when we direct our attention in a new way, we are actually creating a new experience that can change both the activity and ultimately the structure of the brain itself.”

This is contrary to viewing ability to think as an unchangeable trait (for example, “ I am a good thinker or I am a bad thinker”). If we parent with a fixed mindset, rather than a growth mindset, we see our children’s skills as fixed features of their personality or characteristics of who they are. And while genetics and temperament absolutely play a role in how our children learn, every child’s brain (and parent’s brain, too) is capable of growing and changing. The physical changes associated with practicing something over and over again “rewires” our brains.

Why should you intentionally teach your child how to think?

Thinking is important to a child’s everyday life, both now and in the future.

We live in a rapidly changing world with constantly evolving culture. Thinking skills are crucial, because specific knowledge or academic skills that are useful today may not be applicable to tomorrow’s challenges. Our future workers, citizens, and family members need to be able to learn quickly and make sense of new information that will be used to make wise decisions.
According to a review of over 117 studies, “critical thinkers have a better future as functional and contributing adults.” –Abrami²
Critical thinking and problem solving are among the top five skills employers are looking for. ³

2. Thinking is important to our child’s academic success.

Instruction in critical thinkings skills is associated with academic achievement ⁴
The ability to learn and think lays the groundwork for later success in STEM (science, technology, engineering, and math) subjects.⁵

3. Thinking directs action and behavior. We can show our children the direct impact of thoughtful decision making.

“…cognitive control, or children’s ability to shift behavior in response to changing environmental demands, contributes to academic success.” –Hanover Research⁶
Our thoughts lead to feelings that influence our actions. Our actions move us toward or away from our goals (a life of godliness, great relationships, meaningful work, etc.).
Executive function (using the front of our brains to engage higher-order thinking and complex mental processes) and cognitive control impact our ability to set goals and change behavior.⁷
“It’s very exciting to understand (and to teach our kids) that we can use our minds to take control of our lives. By directing our attention, we can go from being influenced by factors within and around us to influencing them.” –The Whole Brain Child¹

Why are you the ideal person to teach your child thinking skills?

A parent is the child’s first teacher. Parents significantly influence the lives of their children. Young children primarily learn through informal experiences within their homes. Children see and practice what happens in their homes. They absorb and practice what is valued at home.

The parent is the child’s first teacher. Parents significantly influence the lives of their children.

Having children includes blessings and responsibilities, and one of those responsibilities is to teach and train . Proverbs 22:6 “Train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not depart form it.”
“Every parent is a teacher. Every single one. They are the ones most closely connected to their child and who have the most personal emotional investment in seeing that their child grows healthy and strong. They have more weight in the long-term development of who their child becomes than anyone else who cares for their child.” –Sally Clarkson, Awaking Wonder⁸

Young children primarily learn through experiences within the environment of their home during the formative years of child development.

Informal education at home plays a pivotal role in learning, particularly in watching and taking part in family activities. ⁹
“…parents can directly shape the unfolding growth of their child’s brain according to what experiences they offer.” –The Whole Brain Child¹
“We are passing on a life, not just information.”– Awaking Wonder⁸

Children see and follow the values and behaviors of their parents. What is valued and practiced at home will be valued and practiced later in life.

“Every day, every hour, parents are either passively or actively forming habits in their children upon which, more than upon anything else, future character and conduct depend.” –Home Education by Charlotte Mason¹⁰
“As children develop, their brains “mirror” their parent’s brain. In other words, the parent’s own growth and development, or lack of those, impact the child’s brain.” –The Whole Brain Child¹
“A parent’s impact and teaching can be for the good or the bad; it can shape an emotionally, intellectually, and spiritually healthy child or can leave a legacy of emotional, intellectual, and spiritual abuse and neglect, or provide a combination of both of these directions.”–Awaking Wonder⁸

Takeaway

Thinking skills can be practiced and developed. Thinking skills are valuable, and parents are in the perfect position to teach thinking skills

CLICK HERE to subscribe to the free monthly newsletter for exclusive brain based tips!

References

The Whole Brain Child by Daniel J. Siegel, MD and Tina Payne Bryson, PhD

Abrami and Colleagues (2008) https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.3102/0034654308326084

Top 5 Skills Employees Look For https://newmanu.edu/top-5-skills-employers-look-for#:~:text=Critical%20thinking%20is%20necessary%20for,to%20help%20with%20problem%2Dsolving.

Vierra (2014) https://conservancy.umn.edu/handle/11299/165155

The Roots of STEM Success https://bayareadiscoverymuseum.org/roots-stem-success

Hanover Research (2016) https://portal.ct.gov/-/media/SDE/ESSA-Evidence-Guides/Early_Skills_and_Predictors_of_Academic_Success

Berkman (2019) https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5854216/)

Awaking Wonder by Sally Clarkson

Murray (2021) https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/epub/10.1080/09669760.2021.1928966?needAccess=true)

Home Education by Charlotte Mason

in Academic, Biblical, Critical

Low Cost and High Impact Ideas For Raising Thinkers

by Rachael Mumbower

August 24, 2022

1 Comment

502

This post defines low cost and high impact ideas to help readers understand what to expect from Thriving Little Thinkers.

At Thriving Little Thinkers I will:

Define a high impact activity or best practice as—an action that a caregiver can implement at home, supported by research or experience to build academic, critical, or biblical thinking skills.
Evaluate an idea or product based on either low cost, or the high value that a purchase can afford

Time and money are limited resources.

When choosing how to spend our money or time, it is valuable to know which activities have the greatest effect or highest impact.

High-Impact Activities

Something that is described as high-impact has “a large or powerful effect¹.”

A high-impact marketing strategy could yield more sales for a company.
A high-impact public health program could decrease infection rates.
A high-impact educational activity in the classroom could yield better academic success.

In the education world, high-impact practices refer specifically to teaching and learning practices that promote deep learning and student engagement. For example, the Association of American Colleges & Universities recognizes multiple high-impact practices in the collegiate world:, writing-intensive courses, collaborative projects, global learning, community-based learning, and more.²Identifying high-impact practices helps universities identify where to invest resources to yield the best possible student outcomes.

The concept of a high-impact activity is also linked to the idea of “best practices.” A best practice is a method or strategy known by research or general experience to produce efficient or effective desired results.

Just like educational institutions use high-impact practices to see where to spend their time and money, parents can use best practices to see how to best spend their time and efforts when teaching their children thinking skills.

At Thriving Little Thinkers, I will define a high impact activity or best practice as—an action that caregivers can implement at home, supported by research or experience to build academic, critical, or biblical thinking skills.

I don’t want you to waste your resources on tasks that don’t provide the most value. Many resources offer some type of benefit. But are they the best? Are they providing the best value for the cost?

Low cost/High Value

While the meaning of “low cost” may be obvious—it’s also countercultural in our consumeristic, social media driven world. We don’t need every new learning app that our favorite influencers are sponsoring, or expensive wooden toys labeled with the “Montessori” name, or the newest curriculum.

Learning takes place in the context of everyday life and interactions. Your child can learn more from a consistent engaging conversation with you–an adult they want to model after–with no monetary cost to you–than they can with hours on a learning app. Are some apps helpful for academic thinking such as learning the ABCs or beginning numeracy and math skills? Sure! Are some resources helpful for aiding in scripture memory to train in biblical thinking? Absolutely. Can an online game or puzzle promote critical thinking? Possibly. But even if costly resources are beneficial, they are not mandatory. Costly resources are not required for learning to take place.

Some products or ideas do involve some cost but they provide VALUE for the cost. Examples might include upfront investment in excellent books, or experiences to promote hands on learning, or toys that promote independent and open-ended play (Lego bricks, magnets, trains and tracks, wooden blocks, dolls, etc.).

At Thriving Little Thinkers, I will evaluate an idea or product based on either low cost, or based on the high value that a purchase can afford.

Subscribe to the free monthly newsletter for exclusive brain based tips!

References

1.Cambridge Dictionary https://dictionary.cambridge.org/us/dictionary/english/high-impact

2. AAC&U High Impact Practices https://www.aacu.org/sites/default/files/files/LEAP/HIP_tables.pdf

in Academic, Biblical, Critical

Welcome & What to Expect from Thriving Little Thinkers

by Rachael Mumbower

November 29, 2021

To succeed, our children must THINK. Our children must be able to use their brains to gather information, evaluate, make decisions, set goals, and connect with others.

I believe it is primarily our job as parents to teach and train these crucial skills to our children. It is our job to teach our children how to think. However, it is easy to become…

overwhelmed by mountains of available resources

discouraged by the complexity of current research evidence, or

frustrated with conflicting information.

As a busy parent you might ask yourself, “Do I have the time it takes to teach my kids how to think? Do I have the right resources? Do I understand how to do this? Can I do this?” The answer to these questions is yes!

You can teach your child to think, on any budget, with everyday interactions that are simple, informal, and intentional.

At Thriving Little Thinkers you will NOT find topics of discipline, crisis and trauma, or neurodivergence (autism spectrum disorder, dyslexia, attention deficit disorder, etc.). There are wonderful experts in those areas to help you.

You CAN expect low cost high impact resources in the areas of brain basics, academic thinking, and critical thinking. These may look like practical action steps, brain health tips, book recommendations, research highlights, and more.

Here’s a quick look at content you might find here at Thriving Little Thinkers:

Topic	Content
Brain Basics	Brain health and function, environments for best brain performance, building basic thinking skills (attention, executive function, resilience, memory, growth mindset), learning styles
Academic thinking Accumulation of facts and knowledge	Literacy, numeracy, education philosophies and approaches (including our homeschooling experience), practical teaching tips
Critical thinking Moving beyond facts and knowledge to thoughtfully evaluate an idea, develop questions, reflect on different arguments, and develop a reasonable conclusion	Evaluating information, the power of questions, experiential learning, making wise decisions, awareness of your thoughts (i.e. metacognition)

CLICK HERE to sign up for the free monthly newsletter to receive exclusive brain based tips.

If you have questions, topics you would like to see, or feedback please email [email protected]. We look forward to hearing from you!

Critical

Too Busy to Think

Time and space for thinking can produce deeper engagement with a task.

Try This

Takeaways

Want to Learn More?

Two Clarifications on Flow and Hyperfocus

References

1. Beauty teaches us about God

2. Beauty inspires creativity

3. Studying beauty promotes biblical and critical thinking skills

Try This Today

Resources

CLICK HERE to receive a free monthly newsletter with exclusive brain based tips.

References

Reading and learning for yourself, as a parent, increases your own thinking skills and is a low cost and high impact way for you to improve your child’s thinking skills. It’s a win-win.

Put your hands behind your back.

I did not expect looking hands to be something that would help me as the adult. I realized that I needed to put my hands behind my back, too. I need to use “looking hands.”

Why is it useful to keep our hands to ourselves?

Here are 3 ways to try “looking hands” in your home today:

TAKEAWAY

This post explains why thinking needs to be taught and why parents are in the ideal position to teach their children this crucial skill.

Thinking

Why should you intentionally teach your child how to think?

Why are you the ideal person to teach your child thinking skills?

Takeaway

References

At Thriving Little Thinkers I will:

Time and money are limited resources.

High-Impact Activities

At Thriving Little Thinkers, I will define a high impact activity or best practice as—an action that caregivers can implement at home, supported by research or experience to build academic, critical, or biblical thinking skills.

Low cost/High Value

At Thriving Little Thinkers, I will evaluate an idea or product based on either low cost, or based on the high value that a purchase can afford.

References

To succeed, our children must THINK. Our children must be able to use their brains to gather information, evaluate, make decisions, set goals, and connect with others.

Here’s a quick look at content you might find here at Thriving Little Thinkers:

Welcome

Recent Posts

Site Search

Categories