Why Thinking Needs to Be Taught and Why Parents are the Best Teachers

This post explains why thinking needs to be taught and why parents are in the ideal position to teach their children this crucial skill.

Why you should intentionally teach your child to think
Why you are the ideal person to teach your child
Takeaway

Thinking

Thinking is actively using your mind to connect ideas, understand, make judgements or decisions, and solve problems. One of the best ways we can set our children up for success in their future marriages, careers, families, or any endeavor is to teach them to think.

The ability to think can be viewed as a skill that can be practiced and improved. With a growth mindset, learning to think is something that our children can practice and improve just as if they were practicing to boost their soccer abilities or video game score. Learning to think can be developed over time through instruction and practice. In The Whole Brain Child¹ a book about brain-based parenting, Dr’s Dan Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson describe a growth mindset in this way:

“With intention and effort, we can acquire new mental skills. What’s more, when we direct our attention in a new way, we are actually creating a new experience that can change both the activity and ultimately the structure of the brain itself.”

This is contrary to viewing ability to think as an unchangeable trait (for example, “ I am a good thinker or I am a bad thinker”). If we parent with a fixed mindset, rather than a growth mindset, we see our children’s skills as fixed features of their personality or characteristics of who they are. And while genetics and temperament absolutely play a role in how our children learn, every child’s brain (and parent’s brain, too) is capable of growing and changing. The physical changes associated with practicing something over and over again “rewires” our brains.

Why should you intentionally teach your child how to think?

Thinking is important to a child’s everyday life, both now and in the future.

We live in a rapidly changing world with constantly evolving culture. Thinking skills are crucial, because specific knowledge or academic skills that are useful today may not be applicable to tomorrow’s challenges. Our future workers, citizens, and family members need to be able to learn quickly and make sense of new information that will be used to make wise decisions.
According to a review of over 117 studies, “critical thinkers have a better future as functional and contributing adults.” –Abrami²
Critical thinking and problem solving are among the top five skills employers are looking for. ³

2. Thinking is important to our child’s academic success.

Instruction in critical thinkings skills is associated with academic achievement ⁴
The ability to learn and think lays the groundwork for later success in STEM (science, technology, engineering, and math) subjects.⁵

3. Thinking directs action and behavior. We can show our children the direct impact of thoughtful decision making.

“…cognitive control, or children’s ability to shift behavior in response to changing environmental demands, contributes to academic success.” –Hanover Research⁶
Our thoughts lead to feelings that influence our actions. Our actions move us toward or away from our goals (a life of godliness, great relationships, meaningful work, etc.).
Executive function (using the front of our brains to engage higher-order thinking and complex mental processes) and cognitive control impact our ability to set goals and change behavior.⁷
“It’s very exciting to understand (and to teach our kids) that we can use our minds to take control of our lives. By directing our attention, we can go from being influenced by factors within and around us to influencing them.” –The Whole Brain Child¹

Why are you the ideal person to teach your child thinking skills?

A parent is the child’s first teacher. Parents significantly influence the lives of their children. Young children primarily learn through informal experiences within their homes. Children see and practice what happens in their homes. They absorb and practice what is valued at home.

The parent is the child’s first teacher. Parents significantly influence the lives of their children.

Having children includes blessings and responsibilities, and one of those responsibilities is to teach and train . Proverbs 22:6 “Train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not depart form it.”
“Every parent is a teacher. Every single one. They are the ones most closely connected to their child and who have the most personal emotional investment in seeing that their child grows healthy and strong. They have more weight in the long-term development of who their child becomes than anyone else who cares for their child.” –Sally Clarkson, Awaking Wonder⁸

Young children primarily learn through experiences within the environment of their home during the formative years of child development.

Informal education at home plays a pivotal role in learning, particularly in watching and taking part in family activities. ⁹
“…parents can directly shape the unfolding growth of their child’s brain according to what experiences they offer.” –The Whole Brain Child¹
“We are passing on a life, not just information.”– Awaking Wonder⁸

Children see and follow the values and behaviors of their parents. What is valued and practiced at home will be valued and practiced later in life.

“Every day, every hour, parents are either passively or actively forming habits in their children upon which, more than upon anything else, future character and conduct depend.” –Home Education by Charlotte Mason¹⁰
“As children develop, their brains “mirror” their parent’s brain. In other words, the parent’s own growth and development, or lack of those, impact the child’s brain.” –The Whole Brain Child¹
“A parent’s impact and teaching can be for the good or the bad; it can shape an emotionally, intellectually, and spiritually healthy child or can leave a legacy of emotional, intellectual, and spiritual abuse and neglect, or provide a combination of both of these directions.”–Awaking Wonder⁸